<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>The Art of Being Neighborly by dapperpepper</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26053576">The Art of Being Neighborly</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dapperpepper/pseuds/dapperpepper'>dapperpepper</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII (Video Game 1997), Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Depression, F/F, Fluff, Getting to Know Each Other, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, In which Cloud is appointed babysitter, M/M, Makeup, Original Character(s), Panic Attacks, Pizza, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Touch-Starved, and runs into Zack. literally</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 08:48:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>19,528</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26053576</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dapperpepper/pseuds/dapperpepper</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Out of the kindness of his heart, Cloud offers to watch his neighbor’s two young children. It’s all downhill from here.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aerith Gainsborough/Tifa Lockhart, Zack Fair/Cloud Strife</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>238</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Art of Being Neighborly</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>First of all, I apologize for the length! I considered splitting it in half, but in the end I decided to leave it as is. This is my first time writing for FFVII but I seriously love all of the characters and greatly enjoyed writing for them. I hope you enjoy reading it just as much. Take care.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Though the thin walls muffled her words, she was furious. That much was clear.</p><p>Cloud had never heard his neighbor's voice reach such high decibels. He hadn't had much in the way of conversation with Reya but every exchange had been nothing less than cordial. Her children often struck a nice balance to her pleasantness — that is to say, they were demonic.</p><p>Perhaps labeling a one-year-old "demonic" was a crude exaggeration. He was sure all children shrieked for cookies like a starving werewolf looking to feast at three in the godforsaken morning.</p><p>Cloud tried not to complain, he really did. Tifa had scored him the apartment at a time when very few doors were opening for him but he knew she could hear it too. And if she could hear it from her own apartment on the next floor, well... she could act less surprised about his occasional late arrivals.</p><p>The mother's volume suddenly devolved into pleading. Cloud really didn't want to eavesdrop but the concern tugging at his chest was getting increasingly difficult to ignore (and the pillow he was smothering himself with wasn't exactly doing its job). He sighed wearily and scrubbed a hand over his face just as the first sobs were heard on the other side of the wall.</p><p>Should he say something? That would be the "neighborly" thing to do, right? Or would he be better off keeping his nose out of Reya's business? He had no idea. First of all, he wasn't neighborly. Second, what could he even do? Cloud could count the number of times his presence had been of any benefit to someone on one hand, although he was an adequate listener, he supposed. Maybe all the mother needed was the ear of a neutral party. And it's not like they were <em>complete</em> strangers — she was an acquaintance of Tifa's and treated him kindly as a result so there was little to fret over.</p><p>But fret he did as Cloud slid from his bed and reached for the long cardigan hanging on the wall in an attempt to look more presentable. He slipped it over his tank top and pajama pants and deemed himself respectable enough for an apartment hallway. Taking a moment to collect his thoughts, Cloud took a deep breath before opening his front door as quietly as he could.</p><p>Reya's sobs and the incessant chattering of a four-year-old could be heard much more clearly now. It was a wonder none of the other tenants had taken the initiative to say something. He rubbed at the sleeves covering his arms and then readied a fist, knocking firmly on the woman's front door.</p><p>All activity inside appeared to halt as the voices ceased. Cloud heard Reya shuffle to the door and pause, probably gazing at him through the peephole. The door opened and there she stood, small in stature with curly brown hair haphazardly tossed into a bun and a little boy on her hip. She was very young, a year or two younger than Cloud himself, with red-rimmed eyes and worried brows.</p><p>"Hi," he said and offered a smile he hoped was reassuring and wouldn't activate Reya's fight-or-flight response.</p><p>"Cloud," she replied breathlessly. "I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean to wake you. This won't ever happen again, I promise."</p><p>He hadn't accounted for how embarrassed she looked, which in turn made <em>him</em> more embarrassed and he felt his ears redden. "No, no, it's fine. I was just..." he paused as he carefully searched for the right word, "... concerned."</p><p>"Ah, i-it's really nothing to be concerned about. I'm sorry about all the yelling," Reya apologized. "I don't usually get this heated but I'm kinda at my breaking point here."</p><p>The woman laughed ruefully and added, "I'm actually planning to leave this place if things would just... stop going wrong for five seconds."</p><p>"Oh," said Cloud.</p><p>"Yeah. But it's all stupid anyway," she said with a dismissive wave of her free hand. "And not an excuse to be a crappy neighbor. But if you could just not complain to the landlord before I'm able to leave I would appreciate it so, so much. I promise I'll be out of your hair soon."</p><p>"Of course I won't," Cloud may have had the patience of a gnat but he hadn't even entertained the idea of ratting her out. "What's going on?"</p><p>Reya blinked. "Well... my boyfriend — you know William — or maybe you don't, since he's only been around a few months since we've lived here. I've just had it with him. He trounces around places like Wall Market, bleeding what little money we have, sleeping with —" suddenly remembering the child in her arms, she paused, "— <em>sleeping</em>, and then has the nerve to call me out on how I spend my days like he knows anything about what I'm going through."</p><p>Cloud opened his mouth to say something but decided against it and opted for a nod instead.</p><p>The woman shook her head. "I'm rambling, sorry. I'm just tired of living like this, you know? My mother, she said, 'Why don't you dump him and come home?' And I'm seriously thinking about it but I should visit to get things in order before I just pack up and move. We weren't on great terms when I left so I —"</p><p>Cloud felt his eyes glaze over. He hadn't expected her to be quite so... open. Why was she rambling to him of all people? Sure, he was the one that asked, but wouldn't she much rather talk all of this over with a friend? Or even Tifa? He really should have consulted her before waltzing over with nothing to offer but some half-hearted pleasantries.</p><p>" — the kids? I can't just drag them back and forth, back and forth. It's so hard on them," Reya grew more frantic as she continued. "This is no life for children. I just don't know what to do."</p><p>Cloud cleared his throat. "Uh, don't you have someone who can watch them? Friends?"</p><p>Reya shook her head, eyes glistening with tears. "I don't. We've only been here two years and I've spent all my time taking care of these two. A few acquaintances here and there but no one close."</p><p>Cloud's stomach turned. <em>Are you seriously gonna go there</em>, he asked himself. He could barely hold himself together, let alone two children that weren't even his. He had watched Barret's little girl Marlene on occasion, although Tifa had always been there. But how could he not at least offer? Maybe Reya would have enough common sense to turn him down.</p><p>He could only hope.</p><p>"I mean..." he managed. "Well, <em>I</em> could —"</p><p>"Really?! That would be wonderful! It would only be for a couple of days, just so I can smooth things over with my mother and make some arrangements, but... you would really do that for us?"</p><p>Cloud almost felt like crying himself. "Yeah..."</p><p>"Are you sure you wouldn't mind?"</p><p>"I've watched kids before," he replied a little too quickly. It wasn't exactly a lie. "It's not a problem."</p><p>"Thank you, Cloud!" Reya exclaimed before throwing an arm out and moving in for a bone-crushing hug. He froze, afraid to make any sudden movements as the child being pushed into his chest looked up at him with big brown eyes. In them he saw intense judgement, as if the four-year-old could see right through him. Somewhere within the apartment the one-year-old stirred and began to cry.</p><p>Cloud could only stare back and hope the fear in his own eyes wasn't visible.</p><p>—</p><p>"Tifa," Cloud said quickly when his friend picked up the phone. He ran a hand through his mess of blond hair. "I've made a huge mistake."</p><p>"What? What happened?" Tifa replied, the worry evident in her sleep-deprived voice. "Are you alright?"</p><p>"No! Well, yes, but no," he said. "I just got back from Reya's apartment and —"</p><p>"Cloud, it's one AM. What were you doing at Reya's apartment at one in the morning?"</p><p>"Come on, Tifa," Cloud groaned. "She was fighting with someone — loudly, I might add — and crying, so I just... went to check on her."</p><p>Tifa sighed. "I know she has an awful boyfriend. Is she okay?"</p><p>"Not really. She ended up telling me her whole life story and I just felt bad for her, I... look. You told me to be more neighborly, right? So this is kind of your fault."</p><p>"<em>My</em> fault?" Tifa exclaimed, remembered she had her own neighbors to worry about, and continued more quietly. "How is it my fault? What did you even do?"</p><p>Cloud sighed heavily. "I offered to watch her kids."</p><p>There was a long pause. A few seconds later he heard Tifa snicker.</p><p>"It's not funny."</p><p>"You're right, it's not. Those poor children."</p><p>"I didn't think she would actually take me up on it," Cloud muttered. "I mean, honestly."</p><p>There was another pause before Tifa continued. "Well, it could be worse, right?"</p><p>"Could it?"</p><p>"You had good intentions. And I'm proud of you for looking out for her," said Tifa. "She's so young and I don't think she has many connections here. Makes me wish I knew it was that bad so I could've helped her too, you know?"</p><p>"Don't feel bad," Cloud sunk back into his pillows. "You do a lot."</p><p>"Mm, but still," Tifa said quietly. "The bar has gotten so crazy now. Of course that's good but I'm so busy anymore, I feel like everything else gets lost in the shuffle. God, I need a vacation."</p><p>"You want me to watch Aerith for you?"</p><p>"Shut up! You're terrible."</p><p>"Is Aerith free tomorrow? She's so much better with kids," Cloud asked. "I was gonna ask you too but I know it's probably too short of notice."</p><p>Tifa shook her head even though she knew Cloud couldn't see it. "M-mm. She took some time off from the shop to give me some extra help until I can hire a few people. That's true love, isn't it?"</p><p>"Yes, that's why you two always make me gag."</p><p>"I know. But if you get overwhelmed, feel free to drop by the bar anytime," Tifa offered. "The crowds die down after lunch."</p><p>"You want me to bring someone else's children to a bar so I can get day drunk off Cosmo Canyons? That's great."</p><p>"Hey, I never heard Marlene complain when Barret dropped her off before work. I'll make a bartender out of her yet," Tifa laughed. "But seriously, Cloud. You'll do fine. Give yourself some credit."</p><p>Cloud muttered, "I guess."</p><p>"I mean it. I'm proud of you."</p><p>"Thanks."</p><p>Tifa chewed on her lip. "Are you gonna be okay?"</p><p>"Yeah, I'll figure it out," Cloud replied. "Sorry. You need to get some sleep."</p><p>"So do you. I'll talk to you later, okay?"</p><p>"Mmhm. Goodnight."</p><p>"Goodnight."</p><p>—</p><p>The early morning light peered through the broken blinds and interrupted the deep sleep Cloud had eventually fallen into. He had dreamed about children — alien children — that had taken over the planet and were set to harvest his organs.</p><p>His eyes shot open. He was a nervous wreck.</p><p>They were kids, just (human) kids, he told himself. People had kids all the time. Why was he getting so worked up over this? Cloud only had to watch them for a couple of days. And who knew, maybe Reya would even come back early. He was fortunate enough to work from home most days, but whether or not he would actually get any work done remained to be seen.</p><p>The reassuring thoughts did little to quell his nerves. He rubbed at his eyes and made his way to the small kitchen. Sizing up the box of cereal and bread on the counter, he found he had no appetite and turned on the coffee pot instead. While the coffee brewed he showered and traded his pajamas for a black sweater and worn jeans.</p><p>He flipped open the work laptop that sat on the kitchen table and glanced at the time — just after eight. Reya hadn't said what time she would be dropping the kids off, simply "in the morning." Since he would be up early for work anyway he just accepted it.</p><p>Cloud filled a mug to the brim with coffee and let the warm scent take the edge off his anxiety. He took a seat at the table, steeling himself to answer emails and pray that he didn't suddenly hate all of the proofs he drew up the day before. He took a large swig of coffee and it sat uncomfortably in his stomach but he desperately needed the caffeine. He could almost hear Tifa telling him that the coffee would only serve to make his anxiety worse but it was still a part of his routine that brought a welcome comfort.</p><p>He almost made it through the entire pot before a knock on the door broke his concentration. On the other side of it, Cloud could already hear the four-year-old prattling on and Reya quietly shushing him in response. Cloud sighed and stood from the table, running a hand through his still-damp hair.</p><p>"Good morning," said an exhausted looking Reya upon opening the door. She managed a small smile and Cloud could easily see the fatigue in her eyes, but figured he had little room to judge. The one-year-old was asleep in one arm while she held the small hand of the eldest.</p><p>"Good morning," he replied, eying the bags at her feet and what appeared to be a folded up pin laying against the wall.</p><p>"I hope I remembered everything," Reya sighed. Her eyes darted between the bags as she ran through a mental list in her head. "I'm a little scattered this morning. Esra has been away from me before but Fen hasn't yet, so... it's hard. N-Not that I don't trust you of course!"</p><p><em>Well that makes one of us</em>, Cloud thought to himself. He nodded reassuringly anyway. "I understand. But I promise they're in good hands. Tifa and Aerith are also good with kids — Aerith used to work at a daycare."</p><p>Reya's eyes were wet with unshed tears. "Thank you, Cloud. I appreciate this more than you could ever know," she sniffled and nodded to the pin against the wall. "I have a travel crib here, just needs popped up. It shouldn't take up too much room. This is Fen's bag; it has formula, diapers, all of that. Esra's has clothes, a few toys. He's potty trained but there are a couple pull-ups just in case."</p><p>Cloud swallowed nervously. Of course there were a lot of things to remember, but the sight of it all just made the situation he had gotten himself into more tangible.</p><p>"Esra eats pretty much anything so you shouldn't have any problem there. No food allergies," Reya added. "Anyway, you always seemed pretty patient to me so I'm sure you'll have no trouble! And if you have any questions please call or text me."</p><p>"Will do," said Cloud.</p><p>After a short pause, Reya looked at each of her children and said hesitantly, "Well... I guess that's that. You boys will be good for Cloud, right?"</p><p>Esra, still holding his mother's hand, nodded quickly. He seemed a bit shy but Cloud could work with that. It was the one-year-old he was more worried about. Fen was just so... little. Fragile. Dependent. Cloud couldn't even imagine himself ever being that small.</p><p>Before he became lost in a cacophony of his own thoughts the baby was gently placed into Cloud's arms. It took him a moment to get his bearings and he tried to mask his surprise as Fen whimpered. Cloud quickly adjusted and held Fen more comfortably to his chest.</p><p>Reya said her goodbyes to Esra and with a ruffle of his light brown curls, she led him to Cloud's side and left.</p><p>The sound of the front door shutting brought Cloud back down to earth. He looked from Fen who had two middle fingers shoved into his mouth, to Esra who looked like he was about to have a breakdown.</p><p>"Esra," said Cloud in the gentlest tone he could muster.</p><p>The little boy pointed at the door and said sorrowfully, "Is mom coming back?"</p><p>"Of course she's coming back," Cloud replied as he grabbed the travel crib in his free hand. "But you'll have to put up with me for a few days. Can you watch your brother for me?"</p><p>"But..." Esra sniffled. "Mom is coming back?"</p><p>"Yes," Cloud reiterated and walked toward his bedroom with Fen and the folded crib in tow.</p><p>Esra toddled behind him. "Today?"</p><p>"Soon."</p><p>"Tomorrow?"</p><p>"Not tomorrow. Soon."</p><p>Esra didn't seem satisfied with that answer but did seem interested enough in Cloud's struggle to set up the travel crib. He had set Fen, who had started babbling, gently onto the floor and tried to get the crib's legs to lock into place. One side refused to budge no matter how hard he pulled it.</p><p>"Christ, who makes this shit?" he muttered and immediately bit his tongue.</p><p>"Who makes this shit?" Esra perfectly mimicked his tone, sending Fen into a fit of giggles. Cloud too would have found it hilarious if Esra were his own kid, however, that's probably why he would never have any.</p><p>"N-No, Esra, we don't say that," Cloud attempted damage control as he finally got the crib to cooperate. It was way more effort than it was worth and he wiped his sweaty bangs from his forehead in disgust.</p><p>"Why?" the little boy asked.</p><p>"Because," was the best Cloud could offer. He stood from the floor and once again took Fen into his arms, making his way back to the kitchen in hopes of getting some work done.</p><p>He rifled through the bags and found what looked like a teething ring for Fen. He brought Esra's bag with him to his seat at the table and set it on the floor for Esra to dig through himself. With Fen seated in his lap and drooling all over the teething ring, Cloud flipped his laptop back open. <em>Five unread emails</em>. His shoulders slumped.</p><p>As he was typing a response to the second email Esra's voice chimed, "Your nails are blue?"</p><p>Cloud broke out of his concentration and flatly replied, "Yes."</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"Because I like it."</p><p>"Oh," said Esra, still staring at his long fingers. A split second later he added, "Cloud, I'm hungry."</p><p>"Did you not have breakfast?" Cloud asked as he watched an attachment slowly download.</p><p>"Uh huh," Esra nodded, his curls bouncing.</p><p>He glanced at the time; it was nearly ten. Carefully reaching down into the bag at his feet and balancing Fen on one knee, Cloud managed to fish out a box of crackers. He grabbed a napkin from the pile on the table, poured some crackers onto it and gave it to Esra, who promptly spilled them all over the floor. Cloud pinched the bridge of his nose because, really, what had he expected? Much to his dismay Esra began to eat them right off the floor.</p><p>Cloud immediately extended a hand out to stop him, but then realized he had been granted a moment of peace. Not one to kick a gift horse in the mouth and knowing he had cleaned the floor, he let Esra enjoy his floor snack. Cloud's phone vibrated not long after with a text from Tifa.</p><p>
  <em>&gt; Hey! how's it going?</em>
</p><p>He released a breath and replied:</p><p>
  <em>Fine. esra is eating off the floor</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; haha very funny. let me know if you need anything, k?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>k. Thanks Tifa</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; np :)</em>
</p><p>Cloud closed out his messages and returned to work.</p><p>One email, some thrown toys and one pathetic attempt at a diaper change later Fen began to cry, which made Esra equally restless. When more toys and rocking didn't work it finally dawned on Cloud that it was lunch time.</p><p>Thankfully Reya had left instructions on preparing the formula. Awkwardly holding a crying Fen on his hip, he set a pot full of water on the stove. While he waited for it to boil Cloud opened the cupboard in hopes of finding something for Esra. Instead he found a box of uncooked spaghetti and potato chips. Alright, strike one. He opened another cupboard and found a lonely jar of peanut butter. In the fridge were some of Aerith's experimental leftovers, expired hot dogs, a jar of banana peppers, a bottle of wine, and filtered water.</p><p>So a trip to the grocery store was in his immediate future.</p><p>Cloud closed his eyes and berated himself for forgetting this vital step and considered whether or not Esra could survive off of banana peppers and floor crackers for one day. Deciding that no, this was not a viable option, Cloud willed his brain to piece together a suitable meal for a four-year-old.</p><p>"Do you like peanut butter?" he asked Esra, who had been pouting dramatically on the floor.</p><p>"No!"</p><p>"I'll take that as a yes."</p><p>And so Cloud began the trying task of making a peanut butter sandwich one-handed. At least he remembered to cut off the crust. What four-year-old liked crusts?</p><p>By the time he finished, Esra had climbed onto the nearby couch and was sitting with crossed arms and pouted lips.</p><p>"Bon appétit," said Cloud as he set the plate on the couch.</p><p>"What's <em>that?"</em> Ezra pointed scandalously to his lunch.</p><p>"A sandwich."</p><p>Ezra's brown eyes widened. "Ohhh!"</p><p>Maybe he had this in the bag after all.</p><p>The water on the stove finished boiling and Cloud let it cool before pouring some into a bottle with a bit of formula and giving it a few shakes. He sat the baby on a small blanket at the foot of his chair and gave him the bottle, which Fen graciously took by the handle. Cloud relished in another rare moment of quiet and became dead set on getting some art to at least one of his impatient clients. He plugged in his tablet and got to work on a logo for a small local start-up.</p><p>His current job was... fine. He liked it well enough, however the pay left a lot to be desired and he had little money to spend outside of bills, rent, and banana peppers. When Tifa and Aerith had first convinced him to move to Midgar he worked as a busboy at the bar Tifa had opened. It was in an old building that was once a corner store in a shady part of town near their apartment complex. But Tifa, ever charismatic, made it work for her. She had a dedicated gaggle of regulars from all walks of life and cared deeply about each and every one. She could remember their usual orders, their likes and dislikes, their family members — everyone loved her.</p><p>Cloud himself always had a penchant for art and had designed some menus and signs for the bar, which caught a few eyes. This turned out to be a great way to network. Even if he was lousy at the actual networking part, Tifa and Aerith were always there to put in a good word for him. Once he had a handful of satisfied clients under his belt he decided to step out of the hectic environment and try his hand at freelancing.</p><p>If a month was particularly rough, Tifa always managed to find some work for him at the bar. It was always more than he deserved, he thought. Cloud wasn't sure if he would ever be able to repay them.</p><p>"Cloud?"</p><p>He felt a tug on the bottom of his sweater and looked down to find Esra, his cheeks flecked with bread crumbs.</p><p>"What are you doing?" the little boy asked.</p><p>Cloud paused for a moment and then said simply, "Drawing."</p><p>"Can I draw too?" Esra began to bounce excitedly on his heels.</p><p>"Uhh, sure."</p><p>Cloud stood and made his way to a desk in the corner of the living room with books and documents haphazardly strewn about its surface (hence why he was working at the table). He grabbed a few blank pages out of a printer paper stack, some pens, and a few markers.</p><p>Returning to the table, he set the supplies down and lifted Esra into the tall chair beside him. Esra clapped and immediately got to work with a look of intense concentration, and it pulled at something in Cloud's chest. Attempting to ignore it, he continued working on the logo design. He would occasionally steal a glance at the boy next to him and each time Esra had added something new to the pages — a vortex of colors, a flower, a sun with sunglasses, a dancing cat.</p><p>It reminded him of his earliest school years and the thrill of being handed a blank sheet of paper, the smell of new crayons, and being told to draw anything his heart desired. It was the one thing he had always been good at and carried with him throughout his childhood. It was a gift for his late mother, an outlet for whatever he happened to be going through at the time.</p><p>... What was this, a quarter-life crisis? He was squeezing his tablet pen so hard he thought it might snap in half. Then he'd really have a crisis.</p><p>He glanced at Esra again who appeared to have all the confidence of someone creating their magnum opus.</p><p>"That's really good, Esra," he found himself saying.</p><p>"Thanks!" Esra shouted. "Do you like to draw?"</p><p>A smile tugged at Cloud's lips. "Yeah, I do. What's your favorite thing to draw?"</p><p>"Um... cats!"</p><p>"I can tell," Cloud glanced at the five or six scribbly cats all over the paper. "My friends have a big orange cat. They named him Nanaki, but we always just call him Red."</p><p>"I can draw him!" Esra quickly got to work on an orange scribble with triangle ears, a big smile, and long whiskers. "Here."</p><p>Cloud took the drawing from his hands. "For me?"</p><p>"Yeah! No no no, wait," Esra snatched the drawing and signed his name in giant, sloppy letters before handing it back.</p><p>Cloud's heart swelled and he cleared his throat, centering himself before he cried in front of a four-year-old. "Thank you."</p><p>Esra had already gotten to work on his next masterpiece while Cloud stared at the art in his hands. It was such a normal thing for a child to do and yet it caught him off guard. He had always assumed children hated him on instinct. He supposed that was nonsense, but he did have a resting face that constantly made grandmothers at the supermarket ask him if he needed help.</p><p>He bit the inside of his cheek and stood from the table, taking the drawing with him to the fridge and sticking it right in the middle. There was just something about a drawing of a fat, happy orange cat amongst a sea of unused shopping lists, bills, and medication schedules. He smiled again.</p><p>It was then that the illusion was broken and Fen began to cry.</p><p>"Fen's crying!" Esra yelled without looking up from his drawing.</p><p>"Super helpful, Esra, thank you," Cloud sighed and made his way to the boy on the floor.</p><p>"Cloud, I don't wanna draw anymore."</p><p>Cloud groaned as he took Fen into his arms. "Then you can help me change your brother's diaper because he stinks."</p><p>Eventually, Cloud was able to send out two proofs and respond to a handful of emails. He had a hard enough time sticking to a schedule <em>without</em> children in the mix but for the first day, he thought it could've gone much worse. Everyone was in one piece by the time six o'clock rolled around. However, he was so mentally and physically exhausted that the thought of keeping up this pace for at least two or three more days made anxiety spike in his stomach.</p><p>As he prepared Fen's horrible dinner of smashed pea something-or-other and Esra's dinner of a second peanut butter sandwich (at his request), Cloud contemplated just skipping his own and heading straight for the wine. But seeing as he had already skipped breakfast and lunch (if he didn't count the time he tried some of Esra's floor crackers — he was just curious) he figured that would be a bad idea. So he joined Esra in his peanut butter sandwich haven which all but obliterated his bread supply. Now he <em>had</em> to go to the store tomorrow.</p><p>That night he opted to sleep on the couch and let the kids reign over his room. His apartment was small enough that if he left his bedroom door open he could keep an eye on both Fen in his crib and Esra on the bed.</p><p>Of course sleeping on the couch and restless children meant very little actual sleep for him, so he spent most of the night on his phone and listening to music in between a changing and one story (no, he would not do voices). He wanted nothing more than to complain to Tifa and Aerith but knew they probably had a rough day themselves.</p><p>Truthfully Cloud didn't mind spending his days alone, but being cooped up inside a tiny apartment with two small children wore him down quickly. He wished he had at least one other person to lend a hand but that was on him; this was his responsibility. Cloud already felt like he was constantly dragging other people down, especially his friends. He would just have to handle this himself.</p><p>The next morning arrived with little fanfare as Cloud had forgotten to set an alarm. He wasn't exactly mad about it as now he would be running on three whole hours of sleep instead of two.</p><p>The broken blinds directed the sun right into his bleary blue eyes and he rubbed at them in a feeble attempt to clear away the fog. He peered into his room to find Fen still asleep and Esra on the floor, the contents of his bag strewn about everywhere. Well... as long as he was entertained.</p><p>Cloud stood, stretched, and cringed at the awful noises his bones made. He stuck a head into the room and quietly asked, "Esra, you hungry?"</p><p>"Yeah!" Esra shouted. Cloud shushed him and pointed to Fen sleeping in his crib. Esra seemed to understand and brought a finger to his lips, which Cloud found pretty cute despite himself. Esra had taken to imitating him and he really had to watch it, lest he send Reya back a miniature Cloud. She certainly didn't need that on her plate.</p><p>Esra ended up having some of the cookies from his bag for breakfast since peanut butter was no longer at the top of his list. Cloud just crossed his fingers and prayed Esra didn't flat out tell his mother. They were going to the store! Everything would be fine after that. In some semblance of a miracle Cloud found himself hungry as well, so he made a piece of toast.</p><p>With the kids distracted Cloud took the opportunity to shower in an attempt to wake himself up. It helped, sort of, until he made the mistake of looking at himself in the mirror afterwards. He looked... well, like shit. He always seemed to have a tinge of purple underneath his eyes regardless of how much sleep he managed to get, but now it was significantly worse. His skin was pallid and he had definitely lost weight, which was a bad sign because he had always been on the slender side to begin with.</p><p>Maybe he wasn't doing as well as he thought he was.</p><p>The thought crossed his mind to put a bit of concealer under his eyes so as to not freak anyone out. If he met up with Tifa and Aerith they would definitely ask questions. He decided to go for it and applied just enough to hide the worst of it.</p><p>Cloud chewed on his bottom lip thoughtfully. It was an improvement, but he decided to add some mascara for good measure. His eyelashes were blond and he often found that a little bit of mascara also helped to bring him back to the land of the living.</p><p>He changed into a fitted black t-shirt, a light cardigan, and jeans and made his way back to the kitchen where the boys were happily tossing their belongings around. He would attempt to get some work done before they left for the grocery store.</p><p>He was moderately successful in between feeding Fen and answering Esra's slew of questions. The store was a couple of blocks away so he mentally prepared himself for the walk and the looks he was sure to get. Reya had so kindly left him with a baby carrier in the form of a sling and not a stroller, and the thought of walking down his dingy street with one child strapped to his chest while he held the hand of another made Cloud want to fling himself into the first dumpster he came across.</p><p>Strolling down the street with a baby in a sling and a babbling four-year-old did indeed earn him some looks; mostly smiles and "awws" from the same grandmas who cornered him in grocery stores. The attention made his ears grow hot and he did his best to look forward and acknowledge none of it. If ever there were a time he was not in the mood for small talk, it was that very moment.</p><p>Cloud had never been so relieved to see the supermarket. He quickly darted inside and let the cool air wash away the heat of his embarrassment. Esra was already tugging at his arm and Cloud had to keep a firm hold of his hand while scrolling through a list on his phone. He couldn't afford much so that saved him the trouble of lugging around a cart and having Esra take a nosedive out of it.</p><p>While he was contemplating where to begin, Esra broke free and dashed away with the speed of a boy twice his age and all the determination of a golden retriever.</p><p>"Esra!" Cloud shouted, his heart leaping to his throat. This is exactly what he was afraid would happen. "Get back here!"</p><p>He ran as fast as he could with Fen against his chest, darting past countless other customers and trying his best not to knock over any displays. The kid <em>had</em> to know where he was going as he purposefully made his way up and down the aisles, but he was so small that Cloud nearly lost him. Calling his name and informing him of all the privileges he was rapidly losing did little to deter him.</p><p>Esra reached the end of an aisle, turned sharply, and Cloud heard the inevitable collision. He groaned inwardly. With his luck it was some asshole just ready and waiting to berate him for his shitty parenting skills or lack thereof.</p><p>Cloud skidded to a stop and immediately reached for Esra, trying to catch his breath.</p><p>"You lose this?" a voice chimed and gave him pause. It didn't sound angry at least.</p><p>Unable to look the person in the eye, Cloud grabbed Esra's hand and began muttering apologies. "I-I'm sorry, he just got excited."</p><p>"Hey, no worries," the person laughed. "That's kids, right?"</p><p>Cloud huffed, stole a glance at the stranger, and ended up looking into a gorgeous pair of dark blue eyes that were wrinkled at the corners in mirth. In a stunning turn of events, said eyes happened to be attached to an equally gorgeous face. His skin was suntanned and his wild black hair was pulled back into a low-effort ponytail. He had to be over six feet tall and he seemed fit, but it was difficult to tell with the jacket he wore.</p><p>Cloud found himself caught in a limbo between admiration and self-consciousness that rendered him speechless. He swallowed and gave a small nod of acknowledgment.</p><p>"How old?" the man asked.</p><p>"One and four," said Cloud as he readjusted Fen in the sling to a more comfortable position. Esra seemed to be having a shy spell after all of that, his small fingers clinging to Cloud's jeans.</p><p>The man laughed warmly. "Wow, you've really got yourself a handful! I don't have kids myself but I know how crazy it can be."</p><p>"Oh, they're... they're not mine," said Cloud. "I just woke up this morning and decided to play babysitter."</p><p>"Well that's noble of you. Good help is hard to find these days."</p><p>"That's for sure," Cloud muttered.</p><p>The man rocked back and forth on his heels a little with his hands in his pockets. Cloud couldn't tell if he was really having that much trouble standing still or if it was some sort of habit, but he found it weirdly endearing either way.</p><p>There was an air of approachability about him; the contrast of how gorgeous the guy was with his casual jacket and old, ripped jeans was really working for him. And here Cloud was, sweaty and exhausted, not pulling off the "just rolled out of bed" look half as well.</p><p>The man smiled and Cloud felt his stomach flip. <em>Stop it</em>, he scolded himself. <em>He's just some guy at a grocery store. Stop catching feelings for random people who barely give you the time of day</em>. He tried to pull himself together before the man caught onto his mortifying dilemma. Someone like him was definitely taken and he probably wasn't even into guys. And why in the world would he go for someone like Cloud, anyway?</p><p>
  <em>Just... stop.</em>
</p><p>"Well," Cloud began. "Thanks for your help."</p><p>The man took a second to respond and he ran a hand through some of the hair fleeing his ponytail. "Right! Right, no problem! Though I can't say I did much, I'll take that thanks anyway."</p><p>Cloud could only manage some sort of weird half-smile but he hoped it would suffice. He gave the man a nod and proceeded to usher Esra down another aisle, maybe a little too quickly. Once they were out of sight Cloud felt his entire body sag in relief.</p><p>"You can't do that, Esra," he sighed and tried to keep his voice even. "You have to stay with me. Don't run off like that again."</p><p>"Sorry," the boy muttered pitifully. "I just want the cookies."</p><p>"You <em>have</em> cookies. You ate them this morning for God's sake."</p><p>Esra whined, "Nooo not those! The other ones! Can I get them? I'll show you!"</p><p>"I'll think about it. Come on," Cloud gently urged Esra along.</p><p>Starting his shopping on the opposite end of the store sounded like a good idea. If he ran into Tall Guy again he may finally have that breakdown he'd heard so much about.</p><p>They made it halfway through the store before Cloud found himself in yet another predicament. The cookies Esra was smitten with happened to be on the top shelf.</p><p>"Oh you've gotta be kidding me," Cloud mumbled and placed a hand on his hip.</p><p>Cloud wasn't the shortest person in the world, but he wasn't exactly tall either. He wasn't about to start scaling the shelves for some cookies and God help them if he had to ask an employee for assistance. Maybe he could just pretend he was buying a broom or something and just... knock it down?</p><p>He looked up and down the aisle to make sure there were no witnesses before grabbing a container of frosting. Cloud reeled his arm back and carefully aimed it just so, and let the container fly. Unfortunately this only further added to his troubles by knocking all of the cookie boxes backwards like a line of dominos.</p><p>"<em>Fuck!"</em> he swore and quickly pointed at Esra in warning. "Don't say that."</p><p>"Hey, uh, looks like you could use some help? Maybe?"</p><p>Cloud jumped an impressive foot in the air and spun toward the voice, a hand on Fen's back protectively. <em>No, no, no!!</em> He could've sworn there was no one in the aisle when he looked. Where did he even come from?</p><p>Tall Guy stood almost sheepishly a few feet away and gave a little wave, wearing that same smile on his stupid adorable face.</p><p>"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you," he said.</p><p>"You didn't scare me," Cloud lied. "I-It... I was just..."</p><p>"Nah, it's cool, just thought I'd help you out is all. If you needed it," he laughed a little. "You've got a seriously good arm there."</p><p>Cloud felt the heat creep over the back of his neck as he stumbled over his words. "I... What... Were you following me?"</p><p>The man blinked and Cloud nearly bit his tongue.</p><p>"Following you?" Tall Guy repeated as he averted his gaze to the rows of cookies and rocked a little on his heels again. "Of course not! It just so happens that I had a craving for cookies and, well..."</p><p>"Really."</p><p>"Yep. And those right there," he pointed to the fallen boxes. "Those are the <em>best</em>."</p><p>Cloud glared at the boxes in hopes that they would catch fire. "So I've heard."</p><p>They stood awkwardly for a moment, Fen sucking on his two middle fingers and Esra clinging to Cloud while watching the other man with wide eyes.</p><p>"Seriously, you should try one."</p><p>Cloud watched as the man sauntered over to the shelves and used one of his long arms to pluck two boxes of double chocolate fudge cookies from the top. Much to Cloud's horror, Tall Guy popped open one of the packages, shoved a cookie into his mouth, and tilted the open box in Cloud's direction with a muffled "here."</p><p>Cloud could only gape at him and the open box.</p><p>"I'll buy it. Don't worry," the man said through a mouthful of cookie.</p><p>"... No thanks," said Cloud when his brain finally decided to process what was happening. "Not part of my diet."</p><p>"Huh?" the man's puppy eyes flitted over him. "Seriously?"</p><p>Cloud shrugged.</p><p>"Okaaay..." The dark-haired man closed the box and wiped a hand on his pants. "Fair enough."</p><p>He should have been offended at the gesture but Cloud found himself suddenly engrossed in the patches on the man's jacket. Before he got too deep in thought, however, an open box of ginger snaps was shoved underneath his nose.</p><p>"How about these?" the man asked.</p><p>Cloud huffed in frustration and waved his hand dismissively. "I don't like sweet stuff."</p><p>"What! I find that hard to believe," the man smiled. "Come on. Just one?"</p><p>The blush on Cloud's neck spread to his cheeks as his mouth opened and closed, but he once again couldn't find the words.</p><p>"Fine," he rolled his eyes, reached into the box, and fished out a cookie. He took a tentative bite out of it and just hoped it would appease the man enough to make him go away.</p><p>Much to his relief the man didn't chide him further. Just looked at him with those pretty blue eyes of his, almost fondly, and Cloud nearly choked. The pieces of ginger snap sat stale on his tongue.</p><p>"I'm Zack, by the way. Zack Fair."</p><p>Cloud swallowed hard and cringed as large pieces of cookie hit the back of his throat. He replied, "Cloud."</p><p>"Cloud," Zack repeated.</p><p>Hearing his name in Zack's warm voice did something to him that was not wholly unpleasant and he hated it.</p><p>A moment passed and Zack cleared his throat. "So, uh... can I tell you something, Cloud?"</p><p>He felt his nervous heart beat rapidly in his chest, unsure of what to expect. He tried to focus on anything but Zack's lips, eyes fluttering from object to object.</p><p>"Look, please don't take this the wrong way or anything. But you are really pretty. Like... <em>super</em> pretty," Zack held his hands up defensively. "A-And I'm sorry if this is weird or whatever but, like, wow. Would you be down to, I don't know, grab some lunch or something?"</p><p>Cloud's eyes were as round as saucers and his stomach sank as he fidgeted awkwardly, pinching the skin of his arm (which was difficult with groceries in one hand and a baby strapped to his chest). He took in a deep breath through his nose in a futile attempt to calm his nerves. Wasn't this exactly what he wanted? But every fiber of his being was telling him that it wasn't true, there had to be a catch, he didn't deserve it. There was almost no use fighting it anymore.</p><p>"Is this a joke?"</p><p>"... You don't believe me?" Zack asked in disbelief. "I'm sure you have people telling you this all the time."</p><p>"No."</p><p>Zack looked incredulous and ran a hand through his hair. "Well, how can I make you believe me? Like, I was walking around the store and I just couldn't get you out of my head, y'know? You just looked so cute with that little guy hanging out in that... whatever that is," he gestured to Fen. "I had to say something."</p><p>Cloud couldn't find the means to respond; no one had ever spoken to him this way. At least, not directly. Sure he had gotten a few compliments in passing but he had never been on the receiving end of such kind words before.</p><p>"I-I'll give you my number, if you want," Zack blurted. "And I'll prove it's my real number. You can text me right now."</p><p>Zack began rattling off a sequence of numbers and Cloud quickly dug his phone out of his pocket. Deciding to indulge him (and to assuage any doubts he still held), he sent a text message to Zack's number. Sure enough, Zack's phone vibrated immediately and he opened the message to find a nauseated emoji.</p><p>"Ha! See? Told you!" he said and sent a dog face emoji back.</p><p>Cloud scoffed but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corners of his lips. The whole thing was ridiculous but Zack's mannerisms were winning him over little by little. He was still some random guy, though, and Cloud couldn't help but remain guarded.</p><p>"Sooo?" Zack asked, snapping Cloud out of his musings.</p><p>"So what?"</p><p>"So, are you gonna let me take you out?" he continued. "Nothing serious, just lunch or coffee or something."</p><p>"I'll think about it."</p><p>Zack's entire body deflated instantly. "You'll think about it? But... you... augh."</p><p>Cloud chewed the inside of his cheek when suddenly Esra whined and started to pull on his arm. "Clouuuddd, I wanna go home."</p><p>Zack smiled at the sight, albeit sadly. "Nah, y'know what, no pressure. You probably have a lot on your plate right now and I totally get it. Sorry if I came on a little strong — I do that sometimes."</p><p>"Thank—"</p><p>"But I just wanna say," Zack said quickly. "I really meant what I said. You are beautiful and I'd love to get to know you. Just... please do think about it, okay? That's all."</p><p>Cloud resisted the urge to hide his burning face from view and managed a quiet, "Sure."</p><p>"Okay. Well... you have my number. Hopefully I'll see you around. Bye, Cloud."</p><p>Zack gave another little wave before turning away and walking back down the aisle. Cloud was frozen in place. Part of him immediately wanted to stop Zack from leaving, tell him he'd just thought about it and lunch sounded great, thanks. But another side of him was still having trouble processing not just his feelings toward Zack, but Zack's feelings toward him. So he simply stood, opting to watch the casual sway of Zack's narrow hips in his worn jeans.</p><p>Goddamn.</p><p>His concentration was broken as Esra started to whine again, trying to pull out of Cloud's grip to grab the box of cookies that was now within a reachable distance.</p><p>"Alright, alright," Cloud rolled his eyes and smiled before grabbing the cookies. "Let's get outta here."</p><p>—</p><p>It probably wasn't the best time to stop by Tifa's bar as the kids were getting increasingly restless, but Cloud really needed some advice. And since the lunch rush should have ended by then, this would be one of the few opportunities he would have to get a second opinion. Maybe he was being a little paranoid but at least he could always count on Tifa and Aerith to be reasonable about it.</p><p>He walked through the doors at the bar's entrance to see just a few scattered customers seated at the tables. Aerith was standing to the left giving a man his change and he could hear her chipper voice bid him goodbye, her long chestnut brown ponytail swaying behind her. Cloud waited until she finished up.</p><p>Aerith walked behind the bar to where Tifa stood at the register.</p><p>"Damn girl, he tipped you good," Tifa laughed as she quickly organized the drawer.</p><p>"Right? Maybe I should come by more often," Aerith replied. "You're obviously in dire need of my services."</p><p>Tifa grabbed a towel and lightly smacked Aerith in the rear with it before tossing it at her. "Then get to it, bar wench!"</p><p>"Such a cruel mistress!" Aerith cried before wiping down the bar.</p><p>"Can somebody shoot me please?"</p><p>"Cloud!" Aerith cried happily upon hearing his voice and gasped at the two little ones. "Babies!"</p><p>She tossed the rag aside and fled the counter to approach him. Tifa finished counting the drawer and asked, "How goes it?"</p><p>"Oh, it goes," said Cloud. Aerith was already homing in on Fen who greatly enjoyed the attention, grabbing her finger and babbling nonsense. "This is Fen, and this is Esra."</p><p>"Hi, Esra! My name is Aerith," she knelt down to Esra's height. "What a handsome little guy."</p><p>"He's kinda shy, comes and goes," said Cloud. "But they're good kids. Mostly."</p><p>Tifa leaned against the bar and smiled. "Sounds like smooth sailing?"</p><p>"Well, I wouldn't go that far," Cloud mumbled.</p><p>Tifa's face fell. "Uh oh."</p><p>"N-No, it's nothing like that, just..."</p><p>"Well, well!" another voice boomed from the back room. "Look what the cat coughed up!"</p><p>"Barret, c'mon," Cloud sighed.</p><p>The large man walked toward the group. "What? Can't a guy just— babies!"</p><p>He immediately bent at the waist next to Cloud and rubbed a finger gently against Fen's chubby cheek. "I'll be damned. That is a sight. What'd you do, kidnap some poor lady's kids at the supermarket?"</p><p>Cloud rolled his eyes. "No Barret, I bought them there, obviously."</p><p>"Well now I just have more questions."</p><p>"They're Reya's kids," Tifa cut in. "Cloud offered to watch them for her while she visited home for a few days."</p><p>Barret scratched at the stubble on his chin. "Awful nice of you. You feelin' alright?"</p><p>"O-kay, Barret, can you hold Fen for a sec? Cloud wanted to talk about something," Tifa said and patted Barret on the shoulder.</p><p>Cloud placed Fen into Barret's eagerly awaiting arms and stretched in relief. The baby wasn't very heavy but being strapped to him for nearly two hours was murder on his back. Barret grabbed a seat and sat near Aerith and Esra, who were playing on the floor.</p><p>Tifa motioned to one of the nearby tables and they each took a seat. She rested her chin in her hands and asked, "So what's up? You look tired."</p><p>"Thanks, I was hoping you'd notice."</p><p>Tifa chuckled. "I mean, that's to be expected. It's not easy taking on two kids, but it looks like they're doing great."</p><p>"Yeah," Cloud replied softly. "Wish I could say the same for their babysitter."</p><p>"Cloud, what's wrong?"</p><p>He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "Okay, I'm being dramatic. No one's dying or anything. I took the kids to the grocery store today and there was... just some guy."</p><p>"'Some guy'? Like..."</p><p>"Yes, a cute one," Cloud said. "Hot as fuck, as long as we're being honest."</p><p>Tifa's eyes brightened. "Really? Well, did he say anything? Did you talk to him?"</p><p>Cloud shifted in his chair uncomfortably. "Yeah... I don't think I made a very good impression though."</p><p>"Mm, I doubt that. What'd he say?"</p><p>"Well, he... Esra took off and ran into him. So that's how we met," Cloud licked his lips. "And he, like, said some things. Nice things. And... I just didn't know what to do. Tifa, I'm so shitty at this."</p><p>Tifa ran a hand through her own long, dark hair and tossed it over her shoulder. "It's okay, Cloud. You didn't outright reject him, did you?"</p><p>"No... I got his number."</p><p>Tifa's smile widened. "Well, see? That doesn't sound shitty to me."</p><p>Cloud sighed. "I just don't know. It's been years since I even attempted to date someone. People don't usually think of me... like that. Or say those nice things. I asked him if he was joking."</p><p>"Cloud!" Tifa punched his arm and he tried not to wince. Her boxing classes were really starting to pay off.</p><p>He rubbed at his arm ruefully. "I know. He offered to take me to lunch or something though and I'm still trying to decide if I should do it or not."</p><p>"Well, ultimately it's your decision," said Tifa. "You know I'd never advocate for something you're not totally comfortable with. But, this could be nice? Besides, I think you deserve it."</p><p>Cloud's nose wrinkled. "Huh?"</p><p>"You heard me. I say let him treat you and if he tries anything funny, you kick his ass to the curb and call me. Then we'll take you out, and we'll all drink and be merry and forget the whole thing."</p><p>Cloud tried to hold back a laugh and snorted. "You make a compelling argument."</p><p>"What can I say?" Tifa shrugged. "Just remember that whatever you decide, we're here for you — all of us. And don't you forget it. Now, what's his name?"</p><p>"Zack."</p><p>Tifa looked thoughtful for a moment and then asked, "Last name?"</p><p>"Fair, I think he said."</p><p>Aerith snapped around suddenly from her seat on the floor. "Wait, what?"</p><p>She grabbed her phone and seemed to be looking for something. She stood and walked over to the table both he and Tifa were sitting at and showed him her phone screen. On it was indeed Zack Fair, looking just as charming as he did at the supermarket with his muscled arms around a few other guys. They all wore suits in varying states with drinks in their hands. It looked like some sort of bachelor party.</p><p>"Is this him?" she asked.</p><p>"Yeah, that's him."</p><p>"Oh my God," Aerith slapped a hand against her forehead. "I always wondered what happened to him! I dated him!"</p><p>Cloud's mouth dropped open. "Really...?"</p><p>"Yes! Granted, it was like a million years ago," said Aerith. "He had just moved to Midgar and we were still in high school. It wasn't serious and we split on good terms, but I rarely heard from him after graduation. His profile's mostly just stuff he's tagged in."</p><p>Sitting back in his seat, Cloud chewed on his lip thoughtfully.</p><p>"What are the odds?" Aerith continued. She set her phone on the table and put a hand on her hip. "So, are you gonna do it?"</p><p>"I... guess? But isn't that kind of weird..."</p><p>Aerith waved her hand dismissively. "Nah. Like I said, it wasn't serious. We hadn't really figured ourselves out yet. But he is a really sweet guy, Cloud. At least I can vouch for him. A little overzealous, maybe, or at least he was back then."</p><p>"Sounds like not much has changed," said Cloud.</p><p>Aerith laughed. "He'll treat you right, I'm sure. Just give him a chance."</p><p>Checking his phone, he had half expected Zack to message him first but it looked like Cloud would have to be the one to initiate the conversation. The thought made anxiety take up residence in his stomach again, but at least his friends were around if he fucked up too badly.</p><p>"Alright," he said warily. "I'll give it a shot."</p><p>His thumb hovered over the keyboard as he tried to think of what to say. Finally he relented and typed:</p><p>
  <em>Hey</em>
</p><p>There. That wasn't so hard.</p><p>
  <em>&gt; heyy!</em>
</p><p>... That was a fast response. A thought bubble icon indicated that Zack was typing something else.</p><p>
  <em>&gt; hows it goin?</em>
</p><p>Oh God, a double texter. Cloud worried at his bottom lip again nervously.</p><p>
  <em>Fine. you?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; great! just omw to class then work<br/>
</em>
  <em>&gt; back 2 the ol grind</em>
</p><p>So he was a college student, then? He wondered what Zack was studying.</p><p>
  <em>That's cool</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; yea</em>
</p><p>Cloud paused again. It was now or never.</p><p>
  <em>So I was thinking about taking you up on your offer</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; seriously man???<br/>
</em>
  <em>&gt; AWESOME</em>
</p><p>Cloud tried not to smile, but he was losing that battle quickly.</p><p>
  <em>I didn't say yes yet</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; oh :(</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But yes</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; OH! AWESOME :) :)<br/>
</em>
  <em>&gt; lunch tmrw?</em>
</p><p>He stared at Zack's message for awhile.</p><p>"Did he text you back?" Tifa asked casually, as if she hadn't been watching him text for the past few minutes.</p><p>"Mm-hm. He asked to go to lunch tomorrow. It's Saturday, but I still have the kids through Sunday."</p><p>Aerith chimed in, "Well that's not a problem. I can watch them for you."</p><p>Cloud raised an eyebrow. Not that Aerith wouldn't love to watch the kids, but both she and Tifa had been working so hard as of late. He figured she would kill for a day off. "Are you sure?"</p><p>"Of course! Also, I maaay want to help you get ready. Just a little bit."</p><p>Cloud laughed and scrubbed a hand over his face. "Now it makes sense. Could you bring your makeup bag?"</p><p>"You know it!"</p><p>He turned back to his phone and typed:</p><p>
  <em>Sounds like a date</em>
</p><p>—</p><p>An eventful afternoon turned into a rather dull evening, but Cloud wasn't complaining. After visiting the bar and putting away groceries he had finished up one logo and sent it to a client for approval. Dinner was a little more generous than the previous day as he made some box mac 'n cheese for Esra. Fen had a bottle and Cloud had managed to get him to eat some slices of banana, which he considered an accomplishment.</p><p>Cloud himself had a few bites of mac 'n cheese and ate whatever banana slices Fen rejected. He knew he probably should've eaten more but he was just having trouble managing it. He was cautiously optimistic for his date the next day, sure. But with that excitement also came more anxiety and an intense fear of rejection. Sometimes it made him sick and he didn't want that to happen while the kids were present or while he was with Zack. He would try to eat in the morning at least.</p><p>Fucking hell. It was taking every ounce of strength he had left to not call the whole thing off on account of his own brain going haywire. Zack may have thought he was "pretty" but Cloud was certain Zack would be heading for the door after about ten minutes of conversation.</p><p>He rubbed at his tired eyes and decided to make some tea. He wasn't sure it would help much but he was craving a hot drink anyway.</p><p>As he dropped a tea bag into a mug to steep Esra toddled over to him, crying and cranky.</p><p>"Whoa, whoa, hold on. You sound like me." Cloud picked him up and checked the time on the microwave. "I think it's time for bed."</p><p>"No!" Esra cried.</p><p>"Yes. See, your brother has the right idea." Cloud pointed to Fen who was already passed out on the floor. It reminded Cloud of a few shitty parties he'd been to.</p><p>Esra flopped around and whined a little before Cloud had him ready for bed. Fen was in the travel crib now trying to fight off the inevitable sleep that was overtaking him.</p><p>Esra was still grumpy, arms crossed and sitting up in bed, so Cloud grabbed his book off the top of the dresser.</p><p>"Here. Do you want me to read this?" Cloud sat on the bed next to him, opened the book, and began to read.</p><p>"No! Do the voice!" said Esra.</p><p>Cloud sighed loudly. "Will you go to bed if I do?"</p><p>"Mm-hm."</p><p>"... Alright, you win."</p><p>He allowed himself to do one — <em>one</em> — wizard voice in exchange for some peace and quiet. Esra was appeased and passed out before the short picture book was finished. Sighing in relief, Cloud quietly set the book on the small end table next to the bed and nearly passed out himself. God, he missed his bed. Just two more nights on the couch and then he could bury himself underneath the covers again.</p><p>Cloud stood and pulled the covers up closer to Esra's chin. He cast a glance toward Fen and saw that he was asleep as well. Even Cloud had to admit it was a sweet sight and an odd sense of pride welled within him. He had somehow kept them calm and safe, and found that sharing a moment with them proved a welcome distraction and quelled his anxiety a bit. As much as he wanted his bed back, he would miss the kids. Maybe... maybe he wasn't as bad at this as he thought.</p><p>He did forget about his tea though.</p><p>He walked back into the kitchen to find the world's strongest Earl Grey tea, shrugged, and drank it anyway.</p><p>—</p><p>The next morning was a whirlwind of coffee, feeding the kids, and cleaning up the apartment so as to not scare off Aerith. Cloud managed to down a modest bowl of cereal amongst the chaos.</p><p>He was relieved to hear the knock at his door; Aerith always had a way of brightening things up.</p><p>"Heya!" she smiled when Cloud opened the door. True to her word she had on her arm her purse, a cloth bag, and a makeup bag. "I brought a few things that I had on hand for the kids. Some leftover stuff from when I worked at the daycare. They can just keep them."</p><p>"Thanks Aerith," said Cloud, stepping aside so she could enter.</p><p>Fen and Esra were playing on a blanket on the floor and Aerith was immediately drawn to them. She set a couple of books on the kitchen table and knelt down to hand them each a stuffed toy (a cat and some sort of weird bear-dog-looking hybrid).</p><p>"We're gonna have so much fun today," she told them. "But I'm gonna steal Cloud first. I hope that's okay with you."</p><p>Cloud smiled as Aerith playfully ruffled Esra's curls before she stood and grabbed her makeup bag.</p><p>"Okay you," she said, directing her attention toward him. "Do you have an outfit picked out?"</p><p>"Uhh... kind of," Cloud fidgeted with the hem of his t-shirt. "A lot of my clothes are kinda similar though."</p><p>"Show me," said Aerith.</p><p>Cloud laughed a little as he led Aerith to his bedroom closet. "Really getting down to business, aren't you?"</p><p>"Hey, only the best for my client," she said.</p><p>"You're just excited to do makeup because Tifa never lets you."</p><p>"Ugh, she just doesn't appreciate the craft!" said Aerith. "The only time she let me do a full face was for that murder mystery party Jessie hosted that one time. She was a little too into that, I think."</p><p>"You know I'm not looking to do a full face, right? Just something subtle."</p><p>"Yeah, yeah."</p><p>Cloud opened his closet, grabbed two outfits he had thrown together, and laid them out on the bed. Each contained a sweater, one a black v-neck and one a dark blue cable knit. His fashion sense mostly boiled down to t-shirts in warmer weather and sweaters in cooler weather. Most were plain but he had a few band tees and a couple pairs of cargo shorts. He preferred clothing that could work in both casual or dressier settings so he didn't have to put much thought into it.</p><p>"Hmm..." Aerith crossed her arms and studied his choices. "Not bad. Nice, but casual enough for a lunch date."</p><p>She touched the blue sweater. "This one will bring out your eyes. You should wear it with the dark wash jeans. You have black boots too, right?"</p><p>"Well, it's either those or my shitty sneakers."</p><p>"Great! Wear some cute socks and give the cuff of your jeans a roll or two. Straight out of the bisexual handbook. It'll be cute as hell, trust me."</p><p>Cloud snorted. "My life is in your hands."</p><p>"Yep! Now go get changed so we can do your makeup."</p><p>He quickly donned the sweater and jeans in the bathroom and returned to Aerith. She had already set up camp at his vanity, a few makeup items arranged on the desk. She was someone who always seemed prepared no matter what situation arose and Cloud was beyond grateful for her help.</p><p>"Ooh, nice! Okay, just sit down here," said Aerith. He obliged and they sat at an angle so the boys were still visible in the next room. "So, let's start with foundation and then play it by ear. I'll show you what I have and you can just tell me what you'd like."</p><p>Cloud nodded, but he didn't want to overdo it. <em>He</em> liked to wear makeup, but maybe Zack would find it weird.</p><p>Aerith matched a liquid foundation with his skin tone and started applying a light layer of it on his face with a sponge. It was really cold and he wasn't doing a very good job of hiding it.</p><p>"Fuck, did you store this in a basement?"</p><p>"Oh stop," said Aerith, putting a big cold drop of it on his nose. When she finished, she grabbed some concealer and applied it to the purple underneath his eyes. She set the foundation with some translucent powder. "So there's the base. I'm gonna apply some bronzer next, but just a tiny bit because you already have nice cheekbones."</p><p>Cloud let her do whatever she thought was best and he chose to simply relish in the intimacy of it. He wasn't often openly affectionate, but something about it satisfied that part of him without being overtly physical. He assumed it was just another weird "Cloud thing" that would raise eyebrows if he mentioned it so he kept the thought to himself.</p><p>"There. I'm gonna work on your eyes next," said Aerith, readying an eyeshadow brush. "Just a little bit of brown will bring out the blue too. Then I can do some eyeliner, but if we do that we should probably apply some mascara or it'll look weird with your blond eyelashes."</p><p>"How in the world did you go into floral design and not cosmetology?"</p><p>Aerith shrugged. "I've always had a soft spot for flowers. I love fashion but flowers can just... really brighten anyone's day, y'know? And it's even more satisfying when you grow your own."</p><p>"Makes sense I guess," he replied. A little lost in his own thoughts, he stopped talking and let Aerith work.</p><p>Eventually she asked, "Are you nervous?"</p><p>"How could you tell?"</p><p>"You keep chewing on your lip. And we've been friends long enough that I just know," she said. "You're allowed to be nervous."</p><p>Cloud sighed through his nose and resisted the urge to fidget with his hair. "I'm just worried I guess. Not as much about the date itself, but..."</p><p>Aerith popped the cap off of some eyeliner and remained quiet, encouraging him to continue.</p><p>"I mean, he doesn't know me. I'm afraid that if he does..." he trailed off. "He'll change his mind."</p><p>Aerith's expression softened. "Why do you think that?"</p><p>"I'm afraid he'll just see a... project. Or something. Like I'm not worth the hassle."</p><p>"Is that what you think you are to us? A project?"</p><p>"<em>No</em>, it's just— well, it's a little one-sided, isn't it?" he asked. "You guys always do so much for me and I feel like I just bring shit to the table."</p><p>"Cloud, that's not true at all," said Aerith. "We all help each other, but everyone needs help in different ways. You need to tell us when you're feeling like this."</p><p>Cloud gave her a look.</p><p>"I mean it! Tifa worries constantly."</p><p>"I know, that's why I don't bring it up."</p><p>Aerith sighed dramatically. "It's just her nature. She does it to me too. God, I <em>hate</em> it when people care."</p><p>"See?"</p><p>"Stop it or I'll draw a mustache on you," she held the eyeliner threateningly. "You think Zack would like<em> that?"</em></p><p>"Well, you would know more than me."</p><p>Aerith finished applying the eyeliner and dug through her bag for the mascara. "I don't know, it's been so long. I shaved my mustache off after we broke up."</p><p>Cloud laughed. "You must've been devastated."</p><p>"Truly." She pulled the small tube of mascara out of her bag. "Aha! Look up."</p><p>Cloud did as he was told and Aerith proceeded to apply the makeup to his lashes, which was a rather uncomfortable experience. Honestly he could have handled that part himself but Aerith was clearly enjoying it too much.</p><p>"Ahhh, my masterpiece is complete," she said and gestured to the mirror, capping the mascara.</p><p>Cloud glanced at himself in the mirror. It was a little more than he was originally going for (mostly around the eyes) but Aerith did have a talent. It was enough to enhance his features without going too overboard.</p><p>"You work miracles," he said.</p><p>"Nope, just had a pretty canvas."</p><p>Cloud pretended to gag. "Vom."</p><p>"Shut up and take a compliment!" said Aerith as she zipped up her makeup bag.</p><p>"What about my hair?" Cloud asked, attempting to flatten the blond strands but it was all for naught.</p><p>Aerith shrugged. "What about it? I think it looks fine."</p><p>"Okay..."</p><p>"Seriously. You look great," said Aerith. "Zack is gonna lose his mind. What time are you meeting up?"</p><p>He glanced at his phone. "In about fifteen minutes. I'm just gonna meet him outside."</p><p>Aerith entertained the kids on the living room floor while Cloud finished getting ready. He stepped into the bathroom to take a breather and when he reemerged, he saw that he had missed multiple texts from Zack: one informing Cloud that he was ten minutes away and countless others telling him that he was in a parking garage but some "sketchy dude" was hanging around so he was going to find another one.</p><p>Cloud smiled and shook his head before collapsing onto the couch.</p><p>"What?" asked Aerith.</p><p>"He's trying to find a parking spot."</p><p>Cloud typed a reply:</p><p>
  <em>Why dont you just park outside the apt</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt; dont make me paralel park dude</em>
</p><p>"Oh boy," Cloud sighed and tossed his phone onto the couch cushion. "This could be awhile."</p><p>Another fifteen minutes later, he received an update from Zack.</p><p>
  <em>&gt; im outside<br/>
</em>
  <em>&gt; sry that sounded creepy</em>
</p><p>Cloud pulled himself together and with a few more words of encouragement from Aerith, he left his apartment and exited through the door of the lobby.</p><p>Indeed Zack was there, looking just as cute as Cloud remembered in a red and black plaid shirt and nicer jeans. His dark hair was free from its ponytail and fell just above his shoulders while his hands were shoved into his pockets to shield them from the crisp fall wind. He was staring thoughtfully in another direction and Cloud was hesitant to speak up and disturb the scene.</p><p>"Hi," Cloud said almost inaudibly, fingers fidgeting with the edge of his sleeves.</p><p>At the sound of his voice, Zack's face brightened. "Cloud! Oh my God I'm so sorry, you must be starving. I just don't know about the parking garages around here so I ended up in a parking lot like, a block that way. I hope I don't get towed. But it would be so worth it because you look <em>amazing</em>, man."</p><p>Cloud immediately felt all of the blood in his body rush to his face and hoped that the makeup would hide it somewhat.</p><p>"So do you." And he meant it, but he couldn't stop mumbling. Shit he was so bad at this. He hoped it would get easier as the day went on.</p><p>"I clean up decent, yeah? But you didn't even have to clean up. You just look that nice all the time?"</p><p>Cloud rubbed his forehead in embarrassment. "Uhh, can we just go?"</p><p>Zack laughed. "Right! Sorry! Sometimes I get that brain vomit, you know. When I'm nervous or whatever. I just say whatever I'm feeling."</p><p>"You're nervous?"</p><p>"Well yeah," Zack replied as they began walking down the street shoulder-to-shoulder (or they would have been if Zack wasn't so tall). "How could I not be? You're one tough customer."</p><p>Cloud's heart sank a little at the comment. He wasn't <em>trying</em> to be difficult. He often had a wicked case of brain vomit himself.</p><p>"Sorry if I... came off that way at the store," he apologized. "It was a long day."</p><p>"Hey no worries. I was tired too so I was afraid I started things off on the wrong foot, following you around and all. Yeah, that was pretty weird in hindsight," said Zack.</p><p>"So you <em>were</em> following me."</p><p>"No! Shit, I mean... not like <em>that</em>. I just wanted to talk to you again but didn't know how to approach you. I didn't wanna be that guy so I would start and then I'd get nervous and stop, then I'd try again and stop," Zack ruffled his hair. "Then I saw you chuck that can of frosting and, well."</p><p>"That's what did it?" said Cloud. "If that turns you on you should see me throw shit when I'm not tired."</p><p>"Hah! Oh man, you're not gonna start throwing stuff at me are you?"</p><p>"Maybe, depends on how this goes."</p><p>"I'll keep that in mind," Zack said. "So what sounds good? You live here so you probably know the area better than me. Seriously, pick anything you want."</p><p>"Uhh..." Cloud was pretty hungry by this point but he hadn't actually given much thought to where they would go. He just assumed Zack would choose. "I'm good with anything really."</p><p>"C'mon, there's gotta be something!"</p><p>They walked by a food truck and a few other street vendors but nothing jumped out at him. There was a fast food restaurant on the corner that he had never been to, but it didn't really scream "first date." He also didn't want to pick somewhere expensive (although there weren't many of those in the area to begin with). There was a pizza joint up ahead that he and his friends frequented; maybe that would be a decent middle ground?</p><p>The smell from the restaurant prompted his stomach to growl loudly and Cloud didn't think he could possibly be any more mortified.</p><p>Zack laughed again. "Let's just go in there."</p><p>"You sure?"</p><p>"Of course. Pizza's always good," Zack skipped ahead and opened the front door of the restaurant, gesturing for Cloud to enter first. "We can get a huge one and split it!"</p><p>Cloud couldn't argue with that. He couldn't remember the last time he'd eaten a meal worth anything, but not for lack of trying.</p><p>It was moderately busy but they had arrived just after one o'clock so they had their choice of seating. They chose a booth in the corner along the large open windows.</p><p>"Cozy," Zack quipped before grabbing a menu off the table. He handed a second one to Cloud to look through. "So what are you thinking? You know you can tell a lot about a person by what pizza toppings they get."</p><p>Cloud raised an eyebrow. "Really now."</p><p>"Totally true."</p><p>"What internet quiz did you get this from?"</p><p>Zack wagged a finger as he scanned the menu carefully. "Ah ah, you're already doubting my abilities? C'mon, hit me. Wait no, how about I guess what you're gonna order?"</p><p>"Oh God."</p><p>"Okay, let's see..."</p><p>Cloud glanced up from his menu to see Zack squinting at him comically, silently judging. Cloud moved his menu to hide his face.</p><p>Zack snapped his fingers. "You're one of those pineapple guys, aren't you? I knew it."</p><p>Cloud imitated a buzzer. "Wrong."</p><p>"No way. My pizza sense is <em>never</em> wrong," Zack pouted. "Alright then, Spinach and Mushroom Boy."</p><p>"<em>So</em> very wrong."</p><p>Zack looked genuinely upset. "What? You've gotta be pulling my leg here."</p><p>"Nope," Cloud lowered his menu and pointed to an item.</p><p>"'Meat lovers'?! Seriously?" Zack's eyes widened.</p><p>"You also never guessed 'breakfast pizza' but I'll let that one slide."</p><p>Zack looked flabbergasted. "I can't believe we like the exact same pizza, dude."</p><p>"I never would've guessed," Cloud rolled his eyes and grinned.</p><p>"Oh, we've gotta get this then," Zack pointed to an item on his own menu. "That's the biggest pizza they have."</p><p>"Uhh, that looks..." <em>Expensive</em>, was Cloud's initial thought. "Huge?"</p><p>"Hell yeah it is. Let's do it!"</p><p>Cloud opened his mouth to protest but decided against it. He really didn't want Zack to spend that much money on him, especially with how Cloud had treated him before. If anything Cloud should be the one buying Zack a pizza. But before he had the chance to retreat too deep into his thoughts, they were interrupted by a young waitress.</p><p>"Hey guys! How's it going?" she asked, her voice chipper. She wore the standard green polo shirt, black slacks, and an apron around her waist. "My name is Yuffie and I'll be your server this evening. Er, afternoon. Whatever."</p><p>Suddenly a loud crash was heard from the kitchen at the other end of the restaurant, followed by gruff voice shouting a string of colorful profanities that even Cloud was certain he'd never heard before.</p><p>Yuffie startled at hearing her own name amongst the cursing, but quickly recovered and tapped her pen on her writing pad. "Well that didn't sound good, did it? Anyways, you ready to order?"</p><p>Zack and Cloud exchanged a look. Cloud asked, "... Should you take care of that?"</p><p>The waitress rolled her eyes. "My boss. He's a real pain in the ass but he knows I'm the best waitress here. Don't worry, I'll get your order in and be right back out before you know it!"</p><p>"Uhh... okay," Zack grabbed his menu. "Can we get this but in like, the biggest size you have?"</p><p>Yuffie cocked an eyebrow. "You are aware that the biggest size we offer is 20 inches, right? It's party size."</p><p>"Yeah? This doesn't look like a party to you?"</p><p>She looked doubtful for a moment and shook her head. "If you say so. Alright, drinks?"</p><p>"Just water," said Cloud.</p><p>"Sweet tea," said Zack.</p><p>Yuffie wrote the order down and with a click of her pen, she fled back to the kitchen.</p><p>"... Anyway," Zack began when they were alone once more. "I know you don't like me saying how pretty you are but, like, am I allowed to just say one more thing?"</p><p>Cloud groaned and let his forehead hit the table. "Zack..."</p><p>"Your eyes look stunning. What is it, makeup?"</p><p>"It is..." Cloud mumbled.</p><p>"Are you a makeup artist or something?"</p><p>"No, Aer— a friend did it," Cloud sat up. "I mean I do it myself sometimes but I just wanted it to look decent."</p><p>"It looks great," said Zack, resting his chin on one hand. "I thought it was makeup but I'm dumb and couldn't tell. Kinda miss the freckles though."</p><p>Cloud buried his face in his hands.</p><p>"What? What'd I do now?" Zack cried. "They're cute!"</p><p>"You are just..." Cloud paused and sighed heavily. "I don't understand you."</p><p>Zack shrugged. "What's not to get? I should be asking you why you don't believe me every time I give you a compliment."</p><p>Cloud sighed again. He said simply, "Sorry."</p><p>"Don't be sorry," said Zack, his expression gentle. "Like I said, I get a little intense sometimes. There's no filter between my brain and my big stupid mouth."</p><p>"You're a people person. I get it," Cloud tugged at a loose thread on his sweater. "I guess that's why I'm wondering why you asked me out, of all people."</p><p>Zack's expression changed to something Cloud had difficulty reading; almost pensive. Finally he said, "Sometimes you just can't explain it. I'm drawn to you. You're cute, you're funny, you care for kids. What's not to like?"</p><p><em>You have no idea,</em> Cloud thought to himself. Thankfully he didn't have to answer that question because a pizza the size of a house was suddenly set on the table in front of them and he was hungry enough to eat a whole third of it.</p><p>"Holy shit," Zack stared at the pizza in amazement. He opened his mouth to thank the server but shut it immediately upon realizing that their plucky waitress had been replaced by a tall, pale man with stringy dark hair and sharp red eyes.</p><p>"My name is Vincent. I'll be your server this evenin— afternoon," the waiter said.</p><p>"What happened to Yuffie?" asked Zack.</p><p>"... Occupied." Vincent said cryptically and turned to leave. "Enjoy."</p><p>Cloud's eyes grew three sizes. "Zack, what the fuck. There's no way we're gonna be able to eat all this."</p><p>Zack was already grabbing three slices and adding them to his own plate. "Well duh! You heard of leftovers?"</p><p>"You could feed a family of ten with those leftovers."</p><p>"So we'll find eight more people! Now c'mon, I know you didn't just come here to sit and watch me eat it all."</p><p>True enough. Cloud relented and grabbed two slices for himself. After they had eaten for a few moments in silence, he remembered something he had wanted to ask.</p><p>"You're in school, right? What are you studying?"</p><p>"Mm-hm," Zack nodded and took a drink of his tea. "I'm studying energy science, but mostly just because I needed to pick something. You?"</p><p>"Nope," Cloud shook his head and picked a piece of ham off his pizza slice. "Never went."</p><p>"Eh, it's not for everyone. Not even sure it's for me honestly, but I get a discount and I thought it'd be a shame not to take advantage of it," Zack shrugged.</p><p>"Discount?"</p><p>Zack grimaced a little and said, "Military."</p><p>"Seriously?" Cloud's eyes grew wide again.</p><p>"Yep. Four looong years — four years too many," Zack continued. "I'm a military brat. Moved around all the time, left people behind, always had to make new friends, all that fun stuff."</p><p>Cloud nodded silently. He supposed that could explain some of Zack's behavior.</p><p>"Thought I'd try to follow in my old man's footsteps, saw some messed up shit, and got out of there the first chance I got," said Zack, taking another bite of his pizza. "I'm... kinda trying to put that part of my life behind me. I do some work for the college now so that's pretty convenient. Volunteer sometimes, too."</p><p>Cloud chewed on his bottom lip for a moment, debating whether or not to mention his own experience with the military. "Experience" was a generous term considering he was instantly rejected, but maybe he would be able to relate to Zack on some level.</p><p>"Probably a good thing I never made it in then," he said. "I tried to enlist after high school."</p><p>Zack paused mid-chew, taken aback. "No way. You did? Why?"</p><p>"Just..." Cloud shrugged and tried to keep the conversation casual without going into many details. Hopefully Zack wouldn't pry. "Seemed like a viable option at the time. I didn't make it though, too skinny."</p><p>That was a half-truth. When Cloud graduated high school in his rural hometown of Nibelheim, he still had yet to process the sudden death of his mother a year prior. He had already struggled with depression and anxiety for the majority of his life and his mother's death only served to exacerbate his feelings of hopelessness. He spent much of his senior year isolated in his room or going on walks by himself through quiet areas — the woods, abandoned buildings, the small creek a mile up the road from his house. He wandered often, his mind in a haze that he found difficult to climb out of.</p><p>It was safe to say that Tifa was his only friend by that point, however after graduation she left for Midgar to live with her girlfriend, Aerith, whom she had met while on vacation. Cloud was happy for her despite his own feelings of abandonment. Tifa herself had lost her mother when she was a child and her father when she was fourteen, so seeing her happy after so long was worth it.</p><p>He and Tifa had become close in high school when they ended up hanging around the same circle of friends. They probably could've chosen a better circle, as Cloud could remember skipping class often and occasionally drinking in the old stairwell underneath the building and the woods nearby. Despite this, he did have some fonder memories of adding his art to the already colorful stairwell walls using paint and sidewalk chalk, deep conversations regarding self-reflection and identity, and listening to music, a welcome refuge from the older students who harassed him.</p><p>If his life was spiraling before his mother passed away, it was on a crash course afterward. He held a couple of part-time jobs just out of high school but the panic attacks were frequent and he found it increasingly difficult to deal with the public. Eventually he felt as if he had run out of options.</p><p>When he told Tifa that he was going to join the military, she was furious. It had been over the phone but in Cloud's mind he could clearly see the anger in her big brown eyes, the scowl in her eyebrows. It was against everything they believed in, she had said. Out of frustration she had called him stupid; he didn't disagree.</p><p>In the end it was a fool's errand as he was deemed both mentally and physically unfit. Tifa and Aerith had reached out to him, practically begging him to move to Midgar as there was an opening in their cheap apartment complex. Tifa's bar was starting to turn a profit and she had some work for him there, if he wanted.</p><p>It was the best decision he had ever made. He still struggled, but at least he was doing something he enjoyed (most days) surrounded by people he loved. He owed them everything, and then some.</p><p>Zack's warm laughter rang in his ears and quickly brought him back, an anchor to the present.</p><p>"Your skinny ass saved you. Not worth it man, trust me. Personally, I'd much rather hang out with you and eat pizza all day," he said, grabbing another slice.</p><p>"Yeah," Cloud smiled, a solid weight in his chest lifting. "Me too."</p><p>—</p><p>After lunch they took the long way back to Cloud's apartment, despite Cloud trying to balance the monstrous pizza box in his arms.</p><p>"Zack, I <em>really</em> think you should take some of this. What the hell am I gonna do with it?"</p><p>"Eat it," Zack offered helpfully.</p><p>
  <em>"How?"</em>
</p><p>Zack shrugged and shot him a grin. "You'll figure it out. Anyway, consider it a gift for humoring me."</p><p>"Humoring you?" said Cloud, adjusting the box in his hands. "I don't need to be paid off for a date that I wanted to go on."</p><p>Again Zack looked at him oddly, slipping his hands into his pockets. "You really wanted to?"</p><p>
  <em>"Yes."</em>
</p><p>"Well that's good, 'cause I... I had a great time," Zack said. "Like, I was afraid I was pressuring you too much. But I had fun talking with you."</p><p>Cloud felt his cheeks redden again and he tried his best to will it away. "Me too."</p><p>"Yeah?" There was a short pause before Zack continued. "... Would you wanna do this again sometime? We could just do lunch again, or..."</p><p>Cloud swallowed hard and tried to figure out the best way to convey that he found himself strangely comforted by Zack's presence and he <em>did</em> want to go out again without sounding like an idiot. But despite his amiable demeanor Cloud still felt a bit intimidated. Zack was honestly perfect, to him at least. He was wary of making any wrong moves or saying something foolish out of fear that Zack would leave. Relationships just felt so fragile and made him anxious, which is why he was all of 23 years old and still felt like a dumb teenager.</p><p>It had been so long since anyone had made him feel this way; something beyond some silly crush on the cashier who always treated him kindly or the girl who waved to him during her morning runs when he worked from the local coffee shop. It was so warm and comforting and kind of terrifying.</p><p>"I would like that," he ended up saying.</p><p>Zack looked relieved and nodded. "Cool, cool."</p><p>Shortly thereafter they were back at Cloud's apartment building. Zack ruffled his hair a bit and sighed loudly. "Guess this is where we part, huh?"</p><p>Cloud scoffed and said, "You make it sound so dramatic and I'm just standing here looking stupid with this giant pizza box."</p><p>Zack laughed. "No no. You look cute."</p><p>Cloud rolled his eyes. Neither spoke for a moment and he shifted awkwardly. Zack was just... looking at him, as he was wont to do, and Cloud's throat went dry.</p><p>"Can I help you?" he asked quietly, the intended sarcasm falling away.</p><p>Zack had leaned in a little and stopped, as if he was having some internal struggle or waiting for Cloud to say something. Cloud remained silent and gripped the box tighter, the blood rushing in his ears drowning out the sound of the traffic behind them. Zack was impossibly close and the woodsy scent of his cologne filled his nose. Cloud drank in his features — the shape of his jaw, the curve of his lips. God, he did want this. He wanted, and wanted, and wanted.</p><p>He stopped breathing as Zack's lips quickly brushed against the soft skin of his cheek. In a remarkable display of restraint, Cloud resisted the urge to greedily capture Zack's lips with his own to <em>show</em> him that he wanted. Maybe he was dreaming, maybe he wasn't. In the event that he wasn't, he remained stock-still so as to not embarrass himself further.</p><p>Zack pulled away and Cloud immediately craved his warmth.</p><p>"So... I'll see you?" Zack said softly.</p><p>If Cloud couldn't find the words before he was really having trouble finding them now. He nodded.</p><p>"'Kay," Zack smiled a little, eyes crinkling. "Bye, Cloud."</p><p>Cloud managed to return the goodbye with a small wave and watched as Zack made his way down the sidewalk to the end of the block. Once he had disappeared from sight, Cloud was left alone trying to process what had just happened.</p><p>He really hadn't passed out somewhere, had he? He wasn't asleep? The solid weight of the pizza box in his hands all but confirmed this. He finally decided to go inside before he dropped it.</p><p>Cloud reached his apartment and let himself in, shutting the door behind him. He stood for a moment to gather his bearings. Aerith heard the door shut and darted out of his bedroom, clearly excited.</p><p>"How'd it go?" she immediately asked and then glanced at the box. "What the hell is that?"</p><p>Cloud set it carefully on the counter. "You were right."</p><p>"About what?" Aerith asked before her green eyes lit up in realization. "You like him!"</p><p>He sighed dramatically, but couldn't hide the grin on his face. "Unfortunately."</p><p>—</p><p>Cloud awoke the next morning feeling distinctly "off." He was still reeling from his date with Zack the previous day and frankly, he hadn't once stopped thinking about it or the kiss. It may have been a simple kiss on cheek but it was probably the most affection he had received from anyone in years. And coming from someone like Zack, no less... he had to keep convincing himself it really happened. He actually <em>missed</em> him and considered asking to see him again later, but something was holding him back. A fear that he had thought too much of it, maybe, despite what Zack had said. That he would be viewed as too clingy now as opposed to too withdrawn.</p><p>Reya was also going to be there soon as the time had come for Esra and Fen to return home. Cloud hadn't had much communication with Reya during her absence since he didn't feel the need to bother her if it wasn't necessary. He had sent her a few photos of them sleeping and playing to ease her worries, but he had no idea what the situation would be like when she returned.</p><p>He hated to admit that he had grown attached to them over the past few days. They brought some much needed energy into his cramped little apartment and taking care of them had kept his mind distracted from less pleasant things. And now that Reya was (supposedly) skipping town, he may never see them again. The thought made his chest feel hollow.</p><p>He was thinking too much. He resisted the urge to bang his head against the doorframe.</p><p>"You excited to see your mom?" Cloud asked Esra as he helped him get dressed that morning.</p><p>"Yeah!" Esra cheered and pumped a fist into the air.</p><p>"Go into the kitchen, I'll get your brother."</p><p>Esra did as he was told and sped off into the kitchen in anticipation of breakfast. Cloud plucked Fen out of his crib and held him for a moment.</p><p>"I'm gonna miss you, you know," Cloud said quietly. "Don't tell anyone."</p><p>Fen pointed to the kitchen and mumbled something incomprehensible.</p><p>"I see how it is," Cloud replied and walked towards the kitchen.</p><p>After breakfast and sufficient amounts of coffee Cloud gathered their things and took down the crib. Setting them near the door so everything was ready to go, he glanced around the apartment. The kids had only been living there for a few days but now it seemed depressingly vacant. He could already tell that he would have trouble readjusting.</p><p>Soon enough there was a knock on the door and Cloud grabbed Fen, steeling himself before opening it.</p><p>"Hi!" Reya greeted from the doorway looking much more rested than days prior; her hair was done and she was well-dressed. Upon seeing Fen, she gasped and her eyes brightened. "Hello, my baby!"</p><p>Cloud handed him to her and she immediately pelted Fen with kisses. Hearing his mother's voice, Esra ran to the open door and met with the same fate. Reya had tears in her eyes as she knelt on the floor and hugged them both tightly. In his vulnerable state the sight stirred something in him, reminded Cloud of his own mother. He quickly tried to brush the thoughts aside.</p><p>"Thank you so, so much, Cloud," she said. "I seriously can't thank you enough; I needed this trip so badly. My mother and I were able to secure a place, it's just not ready yet. I'll have to stay with her for a bit but as soon as I can get packed we're outta here."</p><p>Cloud smiled a little. "Glad to hear."</p><p>Reya sniffled and stood, quickly wiping her eyes. "We never even talked about a price. It was nearly a week — what do I owe you?"</p><p>Cloud startled for a moment. He hadn't even considered payment. Not that he couldn't use the money, but it wouldn't feel right accepting it when he originally offered to do it out of concern for her safety.</p><p>"Uhh, d-don't worry about it. I didn't do it for money," he waved his hand dismissively.</p><p>Reya's eyes widened. "I can't just give you nothing."</p><p>"Seriously, it's fine," Cloud reiterated. "Just... maybe I can visit once before you leave?"</p><p>"Well, I can certainly do that," she replied. "You're a good guy, Cloud. Thanks again."</p><p>He helped her move the bags and travel crib back into her own apartment. Once they had finished, Reya told the boys to say goodbye to him. Cloud didn't expect Esra to immediately slam into his legs and tightly wrap his little arms around them.</p><p>"Bye!!" the boy yelled before running back into the apartment somewhere. Reya made Fen give a little wave before the family departed.</p><p>Cloud made his way back to his own apartment and stood awkwardly in his kitchen.</p><p>Now what?</p><p>Things were just back to the way they were before, and yet he didn't feel compelled to do much of anything. He had his bed back, sure, but that was about it. Maybe playing some music would at least make the silence less oppressive and serve as a distraction. His thoughts hadn't been very kind to him as of late.</p><p>Playing some music on his phone, Cloud collapsed on the couch to lie down. He just needed a minute to turn his brain off and mindlessly scroll through social media or something. He hoped that he was simply overtired and his body was just catching up.</p><p>Unfortunately his brain refused to turn off and instead of calming down, he began to feel restless. After about ten minutes of scrolling he let the phone drop to his stomach and rubbed his eyes. What the hell was wrong with him? He had lived with himself long enough to know that odd things could throw him off sometimes, but this was ridiculous. He felt like a child.</p><p>He considered texting Tifa and Aerith, but Tifa ran the bar on Sundays so it was likely Aerith was helping her. Maybe he should just go to the bar? He didn't really feel like being around all of those people. But he was lonely, wasn't he?</p><p>"Oh my God," he muttered to himself and got up from the couch.</p><p>He entered the bathroom and splashed some cold water onto his face, rubbing it into his eyes. Something had to snap him out of whatever funk he'd needlessly gotten himself into. He glared at himself in the mirror and took a series of deep breaths. <em>Get it together. You're fine. Nothing's wrong.</em></p><p>Nothing was working. Maybe... he should text Zack instead. <em>God, don't do that,</em> he thought. <em>You'll run him off just like everyone else.</em> Cloud couldn't put that on him, they only had one fucking date. No one would want to put up with that no matter how kind they were.</p><p>But wouldn't Zack know eventually? What was the difference between now and later? If he saw what a mess he was now, maybe he could at least spare Zack the time. It was the least he could do. Hell, maybe Zack already knew he had issues. Maybe he had a day to think about it and decided he deserved more that what Cloud could offer.</p><p>Zack <em>did</em> deserve more.</p><p>
  <em>Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.</em>
</p><p>He had to leave.</p><p>The apartment was too small and the air was stifling and he just had to get out and go... anywhere.</p><p>Cloud fled the bathroom, grabbed his keys and his phone, and left. He didn't know where he was going, he just knew he didn't want to be around anyone if he could help it. It was moments like these when he really wished he had a car.</p><p>He made it outside the complex and onto the sidewalk, trying his best to hold it together until he managed to escape downtown. There were some abandoned railroad tracks on the outskirts and woods beyond that; maybe he could go there. It would be like home, Cloud told himself. He hoped that would be enough to calm him down before he spiraled further.</p><p>After what felt like hours Cloud made it to the rusted out railroad tracks. Making sure he was alone, he quickly climbed over the fence and took solace in the woods. He sat on the ground and leaned back against a tree to center himself, his deep breaths coming up short.</p><p>He could feel the tears burning behind his eyes and tried to will them away before they spilled. He tried to focus on anything but the terrible voices in his head — the bright colors of the fall leaves, the birds, sounds of animals in the distance. It <em>still</em> wasn't working and he could feel the warm tears starting to roll down his cheeks.</p><p>He felt so stupid and helpless. How could he let himself get this bad? He thought he was doing fine, but he obviously wasn't if such silly things could throw his entire world off balance. Did he really have such little control over his own life? The thought sent a wave of terror through him.</p><p>His breathing was getting worse and his fingers fumbled trying to dig his phone out of his pocket. He had to get ahold of someone. Ignoring his thoughts warning him he would regret it, he pulled up his messages with Zack and tried to type with trembling fingers.</p><p>
  <em>Zack</em><br/>
<em>sry to bother you but I really</em><br/>
<em>need someone</em>
</p><p>He left it at that and let his head drop into the crook of his arm to fend off the imminent headache. It was still the weekend, maybe Zack was busy. Maybe he just wouldn't want to be bothered, like a normal person.</p><p>Before his thoughts got too carried away, his phone vibrated.</p><p>
  <em>&gt; dude whats wrong? where ru</em>
</p><p>
  <em>railroad tracks<br/>
</em>
  <em>woods</em>
</p><p>
  <em>&gt;????????????</em>
</p><p>Alright, he should've expected that reply. Cloud opened a map on his phone, took a screenshot showing his exact location, and sent it to Zack.</p><p>
  <em>&gt; i'll be there dont leave</em>
</p><p>Cloud let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding and let his phone drop into the dirt. He tried not to think about just how long it would take Zack to find him and just focused on the fact that he was trying. Still, he felt like garbage for dragging Zack all the way out there and that just made it all worse.</p><p>It was nearly twenty minutes before Cloud could hear someone call his name in the distance and he felt his heart beat rapidly his chest. By that point he was an absolute mess and simply texted <em>"i hear you"</em> to let Zack know that he was nearby.</p><p>Soon he heard the sound of footsteps running in the grass and his name again. And then there was a pair of worn brown boots in his blurry field of vision, followed by a pair of strong arms grabbing his shoulders as Zack dropped to his knees. Zack immediately let him go upon seeing the state he was in and looked him over.</p><p>"Cloud! Fuck, I thought you were being murdered or something!" Zack quickly grabbed his hand and held it to his chest. "Focus on me, match my breathing, alright?"</p><p>Zack took deep breaths in and out and Cloud tried his best to follow his lead. He felt the warmth of Zack's skin through his thin t-shirt and his steady heartbeat. He was so relieved to see him. Just his presence seemed to bring Cloud some piece of mind.</p><p>After minutes of deep breathing and Zack's quiet words of encouragement, Cloud's breaths had evened out considerably. Zack slowly took his hand in between his own, rubbing at his frozen fingers.</p><p>"Okay?" Zack inquired softly.</p><p>Cloud could barely look at him, the embarrassment cutting a clean line through the mental fog. He nodded slowly and tried to gather his wits before even attempting to say anything. He hadn't noticed that Zack had a backpack with him until he was pulling a water bottle out of it, popping the cap off, and offering it to him. Cloud tried to steady his free hand before grabbing it so as to not spill it everywhere, but his fingers trembled as he brought the bottle to his lips and drank slowly.</p><p>"Thank God. You scared the shit outta me dude," said Zack, letting out a nervous laugh. "I even parallel parked for you."</p><p>"Mm," Cloud muttered and handed him the water bottle. "Sorry."</p><p>"Keep it," Zack shook his head. "And don't be sorry, I'm glad you texted me. How did you get all the way out here?"</p><p>"Just... ran."</p><p>"Wow," said Zack. "That's pretty impressive."</p><p>He pressed a kiss to Cloud's fingers before letting his hand go. Cloud quickly tried to brush away his tears but Zack was already leaning forward to gently wipe them away with his thumb. Cloud let him, relishing in the feeling of the calloused fingers against his skin.</p><p>"Cold?" Cloud asked quietly.</p><p>"You're cold?"</p><p>"No," Cloud pointed at him. "You."</p><p>Zack looked confused for a moment and glanced down at his t-shirt. "Oh. Nah, I'm a spare heater. I don't get cold."</p><p>He scooted closer to Cloud and slowly wrapped an arm around his shoulders before pulling him close. "See?"</p><p>Cloud leaned into the warmth and closed his eyes. "How did you know what to do?" he asked.</p><p>Zack hummed and Cloud felt his voice rumble in his chest. "Military, remember? I've seen it more times than I can count."</p><p>"Oh... I'm sorry," said Cloud, immediately regretting the question. He probably should have taken that into consideration.</p><p>Zack let the apology slide and fidgeted with the soft hem of his shirt. "Didn't make it out unscathed myself. PTSD's no joke."</p><p>Cloud's stomach twisted oddly and his eyes opened. He watched Zack's fingers tangle themselves in the shirt fabric. Cloud tentatively reached toward him, placing a hand over his.</p><p>"Thank you," Cloud said.</p><p>Zack smiled and gave his shoulders a reassuring squeeze. Exhaustion hit Cloud like a sack of bricks and he was finding it increasingly difficult to stay upright, so Zack helped guide him downward so that his head could rest on his lap. Cloud didn't have it in him to protest (not that he really wanted to). When Zack slowly began to run a hand through his hair, he struggled to keep the tears at bay once more. He didn't realize how much he had missed the feeling.</p><p>"It's gorgeous out here," Zack said wistfully. "Who would've thought such a grimy city would have this in it? Guess I never went out far enough."</p><p>"Yeah," Cloud whispered.</p><p>"It's kind of like where I'm from — or where we lived the longest, I guess," Zack continued. "But Gongaga's more tropical. Real hot, lotta plants, lotta bugs."</p><p>"Hm," said Cloud. "Nibelheim is rural, we have places like this."</p><p>"Is that where you're from?" Zack asked. Cloud nodded. "I've heard it's pretty. Mountains, right?"</p><p>Cloud nodded again.</p><p>"Never made it there. I'd love to someday, gotta mark it on the map," Zack laughed. "I remember when my dad ended up stationed up north of all places. Cold as shit! I know I said I didn't get cold earlier, but that place broke me."</p><p>"I think Tifa and Aerith have been there," Cloud replied.</p><p>Zack startled a little. "Wait, who?"</p><p>Whoops. He hadn't mentioned Aerith yet so as to avoid any awkward conversations, but he supposed that was over. Aerith had said they split on good terms, but he just wanted to be cautious.</p><p>"Uhh, my friends. They're together."</p><p>"Huh," Zack looked contemplative for a moment. "Not Aerith Gainsborough, is it? I mean, it's not like it's a common name. I've only known one Aerith my whole life. What are the odds of two Aeriths living in Midgar?"</p><p>"No, that's her," said Cloud. "She's the one who did my makeup."</p><p>"She... didn't happen to mention anything, perhaps, regarding me and possibly <em>dating</em>, did she?"</p><p>"She might have."</p><p>Much to his surprise, Zack laughed. "Oh boy, she was something else. Super passionate. Smart as hell too, I don't know how she put up with me."</p><p>"She put in a good word for you if that helps," Cloud said.</p><p>Zack ruffled Cloud's hair a bit. "So I have her to thank, eh?"</p><p>Cloud grinned. "I guess you do."</p><p>Zack drew a breath, letting the fresh air fill his lungs. "Glad she's found someone. We were both kinda going through it when we dated. I was a mess after moving before my senior year and trying to figure out what the hell I was gonna do afterwards."</p><p>Cloud swallowed and recalled his own senior year, of which he spent the majority alone and in the throes of a deep depression. He debated opening up about a topic that still weighed so heavily on his heart. He definitely hadn't been able to process it as he probably should have.</p><p>"High school sucked," he said.</p><p>Zack laughed. "You got that right. But after nine or ten years and a handful of awful decisions I guess you learn what really matters."</p><p>Cloud hummed in agreement. He appreciated Zack's sincerity and that he didn't pry for information. Cloud found himself wishing he could be half as open and honest. He was getting better at it (or at least he thought so) but being vulnerable was exceedingly difficult, not to mention terrifying.</p><p>"Well as lovely as it is out here, I think we should get out of the cold if you're feeling up to it," said Zack. "Man, you look half-frozen. And I thought Nibelheim was always cold."</p><p>"It's not that cold there, just a higher elevation. There are seasons." Cloud smiled and rolled his eyes. He had calmed considerably and the weather had started to get to him, so he welcomed the opportunity to migrate somewhere more comfortable.</p><p>"What, cold and more cold?" Zack stood and slowly helped Cloud to his feet.</p><p>"Like you'd know," said Cloud.</p><p>Zack helped dust him off, plucked a few dead leaves out of his hair, and rested a hand on his back as they made their way towards the railroad tracks.</p><p>"My car's just over there. Hop in, I'll give you a ride anywhere you wanna go," Zack said, using his long legs to climb over the fence with ease.</p><p>Deciding that walking all the way back to his apartment was indeed a terrible idea, Cloud followed, Zack lending him a hand on the way down from the fence.</p><p>A few cars lined the curb and Cloud silently tried to guess which one was Zack's along the way. They ventured further until Zack stopped at an old red Honda Accord that looked like it had been through Armageddon and was parked at an awkward angle.</p><p>"I thought you said you parallel parked for me," said Cloud.</p><p>Zack looked at the car, then back to him. "I did."</p><p>"You call <em>that</em> parallel parking?"</p><p>"Oh, <em>ha ha,</em>" Zack replied. "C'mon, I was worried! Did you think I was gonna spend ten minutes just trying to park?"</p><p>"Oh sure, blame it on me," Cloud grinned.</p><p>Zack opened the passenger side door. "Alright, get in, Cloudy."</p><p>"Don't call me that."</p><p>Cloud took a seat and shut the door while Zack got in on the driver's side.</p><p>"So, where to?" he asked when they were situated.</p><p>"Uhh, just... back to my place, I guess." Cloud really didn't think he could stand to be anywhere else right then, but he didn't want to be alone either. It helped to be distracted. "... You can come too, if you want. There's five months worth of pizza in there."</p><p>"Say no more!" Zack shouted, already attempting to wriggle out of his parking spot.</p><p>Miraculously, he succeeded without incident. The car rattled a little as they pulled out onto the street and the air freshener hanging off the rearview mirror swung and almost hit Cloud in the face every time they made a turn.</p><p>Upon reaching the street where Cloud's apartment building was located, Zack sighed.</p><p>"You gonna try it?" Cloud asked as Zack glared at the open space on the curb.</p><p>"I'm gonna do it," he said with conviction. "This is my spot now."</p><p>It took about five minutes but with Cloud's assistance, Zack managed to parallel park successfully. They exited the vehicle and Cloud let them into the building, and then made his way toward the stairs in the lobby.</p><p>"Sorry, it's on the fourth floor," he said as they began their ascent.</p><p>"You don't use the elevator?" Zack remarked, pointing to it.</p><p>Cloud chewed the inside of his cheek. "No, it's old. And I just… don't like them."</p><p>"Ah, gotcha," Zack nodded in understanding. "Great exercise though. No wonder your ass is killer."</p><p>
  <em>"Zack!"</em>
</p><p>"My bad. Just making an observation."</p><p>"Do you want pizza or not?"</p><p>"You would really make me walk up all these stairs and not give me any pizza?" Zack asked woefully.</p><p>"Try me."</p><p>"Point taken. I'll be good."</p><p>They made it to the fourth floor and down the narrow hallway to Cloud's apartment. He was suddenly very grateful that he had cleaned it up several times over the last few days. He unlocked the door and let Zack in.</p><p>"Cute!" Zack exclaimed immediately upon entering.</p><p>"Not the word I would've picked, but thanks." Cloud set his keys and the water bottle on the counter. "Feel free to sit anywhere."</p><p>Zack heeded his words and was already making a beeline for the couch. Turning to face the fridge, Cloud attempted to hide the stupid smile on his face. The exhaustion was really doing awful things to him.</p><p>He opened the fridge and stuck his head in it to wake himself up. "So do you want five slices or ten?"</p><p>"Ten is good," Zack yelled from the couch.</p><p>Not entirely sure if he was serious or not, Cloud piled five pieces on a plate for Zack and two for himself. He was hungry for sure, but he also didn't want to test his nerves anymore if he could help it. He started to put Zack's plate in the microwave.</p><p>"Oh, you don't have to microwave it. I like it cold," said Zack.</p><p>Cloud made a face. "... Really? Ew."</p><p>He left Zack's out and microwaved his own lunch instead. Once it was finished, he grabbed both plates and joined Zack on the couch. Zack accepted his gratefully and promptly got to work on making it disappear.</p><p>Cloud chewed thoughtfully in silence. There was so much he wanted to say but it was like there was some kind of wall between his brain and his mouth. He wanted Zack to know just how much he appreciated his help; how had he had done some much for Cloud already? What kind of person just dropped everything for someone they had only known for three days? It was baffling.</p><p>"Um," he muttered. Not a great start, but a start nonetheless. He cleared his throat. "So I just wanted to say thanks again. For... all of this. I know I have some issues but I'm working on it."</p><p>"Hey, you would have done the same for me," Zack said. "You never have to apologize for that."</p><p>He was right. Cloud <em>would</em> have dropped everything for him had the positions been reversed. At least Zack knew that.</p><p>"I just... you're right. I just didn't want you to put that on you so soon. It's not fair to you," Cloud said, shoving pizza into his mouth before he could say anything else.</p><p>"Huh? Man, you didn't put anything on me," Zack replied. "I don't think you have any idea how much I care about you."</p><p>Cloud nearly choked on his pizza, but quickly recovered. "I guess I just don't see myself as you do so I don't really understand."</p><p>"Well that sucks. I wish you could, 'cause you're pretty great."</p><p>Before Cloud could further his journey down the path of self-deprecation, Zack was swiping a thumb across Cloud's cheek and licking the pizza sauce off of it.</p><p>"<em>Ugh!</em> You are so gross," Cloud was pretty sure his entire face had turned a lovely shade of beet red. He wiped a hand across his cheek to make sure there was no sauce left lest the action be repeated.</p><p>"Yeah but you love it."</p><p>"... Is it fucked up that I kinda do?"</p><p>"Nah. Just go with it."</p><p>Cloud shook his head and reached for the remote on the end table. "I don't have cable, but we can watch a movie... if you want. It's okay if you need to get back."</p><p>Zack sunk further into the couch and grinned. "I'm down. Actually, I'm so comfortable you might never get rid of me."</p><p>"Oh God."</p><p>"Sorry, that's what happens," Zack shrugged and took another bite of pizza.</p><p>Cloud determined that it wouldn't be the worst outcome. He turned the TV on and scooted closer to Zack. Just a little.</p><p>They found a movie that neither of them had seen before and settled in for the long haul. Cloud rested his head on Zack's shoulder and relaxed for what felt like the first time in weeks, the warmth settling deep into his bones. He just had to make sure he didn't fall asleep.</p><p>He almost jumped when Zack placed a kiss on the top of his head.</p><p>"Get sauce in my hair and I'll eat the rest of your pizza."</p><p>"Noted!"</p><p>Cloud decided to steal a bite out of Zack's pizza anyway and laughed at his mock cry of disgust. It was as if they had known each other for a lifetime; a feeling that was somehow unusual and natural and whole. Maybe it didn't have to make sense, for once.</p><p>He could definitely get used to it.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>